Wednesday Wordplay: Martha Stewart and Facebook Bingo

Scotty Zacher | April 7, 2010 | 0 Comments

Motivational Quotes

The longer I live the more beautiful life becomes.
— Frank Lloyd Wright

Do not be too moral. You may cheat yourself out of much life. Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something.
— Henry David Thoreau

Life is too complicated not to be orderly.
— Martha Stewart, quoted in Harper’s Bazaar

Poverty cannot deprive us of many consolations. It cannot rob us of the affection we have for each other, or degrade us in our own opinion, of in that of any person, whose opinion we ought to value.
— Ann Radcliffe, The Mysteries of Udolpho, 1764

Toughness doesn’t have to come in a pinstriped suit.
— Senator Dianne Feinstein

One thing I’ve learned in all these years is not to make love when you really don’t feel it; there’s probably nothing worse you can do to yourself than that.
— Norman Mailer

Mark Twain on the length of German words and sentences:

"Whenever the literary German dives into a sentence, that is the last you are going to see of him till he emerges on the other side of his Atlantic with his verb in his mouth." -Mark Twain "A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court"

Facebook bingo

(noun) On Facebook, this term refers to a posted photo that features five or more people, all of whom have Facebook profiles and are accurately tagged.

At a dinner table of 10 people – "Let’s get the waitress to take a picture of us! OMG, this is totally gonna be a Facebook bingo!"

English explorations

“Queen’s English” and the upper class usage of “one”

From: http://www.ic.arizona.edu/~lsp/QueensEnglish.html

The "Royal ONE"
The pronominal usage of "one" is not only stereotypically associated with the upper classes, and especially the Royal Family, but that is also used frequently in their real life. There are a number of ways that the word "one" is used in place of "I", and it has also been seen to be commonly used in those people connected with the Royal Family. Friends of the family as well as household help like the Queen’s dresser or an ex-cook have been heard to use the phrase "one" in place of "I."
Examples:
"One says to oneself: "Oh God, there’s one’s daughter"
(Father of the Duchess of York – quoted from The Star, July 1986)
"One hesitates to use such a trite word as delighted, but of course one IS delighted"
(The Queen’s dresser – quoted on receiving his knighthood – The Guardian, June 1989)
General pronunciation
The Queen and Older Royals might pronounce the following words as noted.
Examples:
house = hice
off = orf
tower = tar
refined = refained
Younger royals might exhibit the following types of pronunciations:
really = rairly
milk = miuk
yes = yah
St. Paul’s = St. Pauw’s

RETARDED GRANDPARENTS

After Christmas, a teacher asked her young 3rd-grade pupils how they spent their
holiday away from school. One child wrote the following:

We always used to spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa. They used to live in a big brick house, but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Arizona . Now they live in a tin box and have rocks painted green to look like grass. They ride around on their bicycles, and wear name tags, because they don’t know who they are anymore.

They go to a building called a wreck center, but they must have got it fixed because it is all okay now, they do exercises there, but they don’t do them very well. There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with hats on.

At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out, and go cruising in their golf carts. Nobody there cooks, they just eat out. And, they eat the same thing every night – early birds.

Some of the people can’t get out past the man in the doll house. The ones who do get out, bring food back to the wrecked center for pot luck. My Grandma says that Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and, says I should work hard so I can be retarded someday too. When I earn my retardment, I want to be the man in the doll house. Then I will let people out, so they can visit their grandchildren!